Have you ever wished you could see into the future? Like gazing into a crystal ball? Knowing what lies ahead? Positives or negatives? Bumps in the road or smooth, flawless driving? Definitely a silly question to ask if you’re walking the infertility path and/or doing IVF treatments.
Not a day does by wishing that I could see into the future, particularly as much of this journey is spent waiting, waiting, waiting, to discover the same dreaded fate, each and every month.
My curiosity got the better of me, and today I saw a psychic. In the hopes of seeing what the future holds for myself and Troy and settling my grief. I needed some direction. Some answers. I’m sick of feeling like the unknown is weighing me down.
Where is my life going? It feels like at the moment the roller coaster ride we are on is getting quicker and far more intense rather than slowing down to a halt and allowing us to jump off. 2013 was such a crappy year. Will this year be better? Will we ever be blessed with that bundle of joy and become parents? And when? Are we wasting our time with IVF? Will I need to use donor eggs? Is our angel looking down on us from heaven? What sex was our angel? Does our angel know we loved him/her? What will happen with my employment this year now that our school has lost enrollments? Where will I be teaching and what class? These were all questions I had hoped would be answered. And I got more than I had bargained for.
Walking into the room where the psychic expo was being held was overwhelming. I’d never seen a psychic before. A virgin to say the least! I immediately had a decision to make. Which psychic was I going to trust and allow to read into my future and perhaps give me crippling bad news or the good news I’ve been seeking so desperately? I chose a lady called Ishjana. From reading her profile which was stuck onto a whiteboard, I liked that she was compassionate. She looked caring. And that she was.
I was gobsmacked at the accuracy of her reading. I told her very little information, and she touched on many events of my present life. I left feeling elated. Like a huge weight had been lifted from my shoulders. I had a grin from ear to ear. I almost felt as happy and excited as the day we got our first positive pregnancy test with our Angel. The jumping up and down kind of joy. At last, someone had told me those words that I wanted to hear so badly. Someone who genuinely knew. Someone who just wasn’t saying it. Someone who could see it as my future.
I will be a Mum soon!!! Within the next year!!
A Mum to 2 babies in fact. Not twins though. Two separate pregnancies. And there’ll be no trouble. She could feel it strongly. I just need to stop worrying and it will come. I feel so at ease knowing this. I’m just going to relax in knowing this, and enjoy my next IVF cycle (if there’s such a thing!!)
I also have 2 spirits following me and protecting me. One is a baby, and the other a lady with fair, curly hair who is thankful for something I’ve done to help her or a family member. I have no idea who the second spirit is. Perhaps that will come to me at a later time. But I have no doubts the baby spirit is our angel. Apparently they are sending me clues all the time. I just need to look out for them. It makes me feel warm and fuzzy inside knowing that my angel follows me everyday, everywhere.
Travel is on my horizon- better go book that cruise that I’ve been researching but too hesitant to book in case I do fall pregnant. A move too (would be nice). And a new horizon for employment- perhaps starting my own business. Not really sure on the validity of that prediction, but I will remain open minded to it. I could do with a change!! Troy my fiancé already has his own business, but it has been quiet of late.
The one prediction that concerned me was regarding my mothers health deteriorating. She has been caring for my grandmother full time who has Alzheimer’s, which of late has deteriorated quite significantly. She doesn’t even remember my Mum’s name; her own daughters name. She predicted that my mother will need to look out more for her own health, which sounds true, as she has been so busy caring for Grandma lately that she’s barely had time to look out for herself and take her own needs into account. Something I will need to keep a close eye on.
Apart from that, I am joyous about my first psychic reading and it has given me a new lease on life. I will be a Mum. Troy will be a Dad. And our Angel will always be with us no matter where we go. And most importantly, I’m going to be a Mum. I will carry this hope, and embrace it. I hope you all can dig down and find some hope too!