Monthly Archives: May 2014

Pregnancy is not a Joke


Pregnancy, what a sacred, special time. How I wish I could experience that magical blessing. Unfortunately, I am infuriated by those who must use Facebook as an avenue to treat it like a joke, and post implying posts on Facebook to make people gossip and “think” that they are pregnant, whether it be true or not. To the person who posted it, ever thought how much that stabs a hole in the infertile woman’s heart? Why must you joke about something so special, that I can only dream about?

Yes I am having a bad day, how I would like this person to know just how much they have upset me. But what good would that do? People just fail to understand how their thoughts, actions and words hurt others. What do they understand about the infertile woman’s feelings when they haven’t walked this tumultuous path? How I wish life could be different, and I didn’t have to be faced with shit like this everyday. Not only on Facebook, but also with people in general. For example, not even being able to walk down the street to get lunch without being asked how the baby making is going.  There’s no escaping the pain of infertility. The questions. The hurtful comments. The insensitivities. The inconsideration.  Maybe a break from Facebook is needed again, but then I don’t get the support of the people who really care- who are few and far between and as a matter of fact, are mostly women I have never met! I wish I could have a break from life in general. So … over …. it ….. all …..


Mother’s Day- Not Just For Those Who Hold Their Children


Mother’s Day. A day founded by Anna Jarvis. She never married and never had kids herself, but she worked hard to bestow honor on all mothers. Anna was one of 11 children, with her mother also being a bereaved mother too, with only four of her children including Anna living until adulthood. Anna Jarvis expressed her desire that someday someone must honor all mothers, living and dead, and pay tribute to the contributions made by them. Hence the creation of a Day to recognise all Mother’s on the 2nd Sunday of May.

So every Mother’s Day, we recognise the vital roles Mother’s play in all of our lives. Where would we be without our Mum’s? And where would I be without Troy’s Mum nurturing and raising the man I love? That said, I know I am privileged to have my Mum, as some aren’t so lucky to have their Mum’s with them to wish Happy Mother’s Day to on this hallmark occasion.

But how about also paying tribute to ALL Mother’s this Mother’s Day? For that is why Anna Jarvis created Mother’s Day. The Mother’s who have lost their babies too early and are still awaiting the chance to become a Mum, and also the women who yearn more than ever the opportunity to become a Mum but haven’t been blessed with that opportunity yet even though they’ve tried so hard. I wish society would remember and acknowledge that these women are Mum’s too. And I am just one of those many women.

Each and every month, I make sacrifices just like any Mum. I sacrifice normality in my life. Giving up eating gluten, dairy, red meat in the hope that it will help me become a Mother. Not drinking coffee, alcohol, the list goes on. I take a swig of vile herbs every day in the hope that it may increase my chance of becoming fertile and thus becoming a Mother. During IVF cycles, I self administer injections of synthetic hormones into my stomach not thinking about the risks or harm those synthetic hormones may cause to my health with diseases such as cancer, but instead the opportunity it creates for me to produce eggs and become a Mum. I sacrifice money. Every cent I earn goes towards fertility treatment and my future child. I have undergone 5 operations in the last 9 months, I dream everyday about becoming a Mum. I dream everyday about my 2 angel babies. I have had 2 miscarriages, lost my dreams, but still carry on doing anything I can to become a Mum.

So this Mother’s Day, I’d like to acknowledge all Mum’s out there. For Mother’s Day is for everyone, not just the Mum’s who hold their children. We must acknowledge the Mum’s who have living babies and children and are doing a magnificent job in raising then into remarkable little human beings, but also the Mum’s out there who have lost their babies too soon, and most importantly I’d like to recognise the Mum’s to be. Although you have no babies (yet), the sacrifices you make to become a Mum are equivalent, if not more than the sacrifices some Mum’s make. And many of you have made bigger sacrifices than me and been on this ride for longer than me. But that’s what makes us Mum’s. No matter how hard it gets, how long it takes, we still battle on trying to achieve our dream of having children one day. We never give up on our future children. And someday soon, hopefully we will have the greatest gift in the world in having that little person call us Mum and having a real life baby to nurture and hold. Happy Mother’s Day! Xx